Post by kingrat on Feb 14, 2011 14:42:45 GMT -5
The Armadillo Annihilator
Episode 2 - Field Testing The MDTLD
As El Jefe toiled away in his private workshop, he was mildly annoyed by the repeated claps of thunder as the sound made its way through the hundreds a feet of soil and rock above. He was in the most highly secluded part of the AK Bunker headquarters campus deep underground beneath the headquarters campus at the secret volcano base but the sound of "God's gunfire" during the thunderstorm made its way through nevertheless. It was this annoyance at the unwelcome noise, which distracted his thought process, that spawned El Jefe's most brilliant idea to date. "What if I mate the MDTLD to one of those new-fangled repeating rifles we just started selling to the Confederation Navy?"
AK Bunker had recently developed a musket that would not only re-load itself automatically from a bucket of bullets hung beneath the rifle on a thin strand of magtanium wire, but fired projectiles at much higher velocity than the current muskets in use by the Navy's elite special operations teams. Another feature of the new Ak bunker Repeating musket (AR Musket) was the elimination of the traditional bell mouth at the business end of the bullet belching tube, since ram-rods were no longer required for loading. The elimination of the bell-mouth was incorporated in model 15 of the AR Musket and it became known among the elite military units as the AR-15. Because there was room for storage of their Playboy and Penthouse training manuals in the bucket along with the bullets, the ammunition storage container of the AR-15 weapon system became known as the "Magazine."
The crowning glory of the AR-15 design - made possible by the elimination of the bell-mouth on the bullet belching tube - was the integral baffle arrangement built into the tube. Leeboat had integrated his earlier invention, known as the Fragrant Aroma Retention & Timing (FART) device into the bullet belching tube of the AR-15 in an effort to keep the troops from being annoyed by the pungent smell of the burnt gunpowder. The troops didn't find this feature to be particularly important but this word never made it back to the Polygon, so the Navy never asked for a reduction in the contract price.
The FART had never become a commercial success because Leeboat underestimated the number of people who needed to be able to pass gas under the bed covers without disturbing their spouse. It seems that Princess Rebecca was particularly offended by Leeboat's gaseous nocturnal emissions and made some threat about withholding certain domestic services unless reasonably pleasant breathing atmosphere could be maintained. Necessity, as they say, is the mother of invention and this untenable situation led to the Leeboat's invention of the FART device.
Incorporation of FART into the bullet belching tube of the AR-15 resulted in elimination of gunpowder aroma for the troops and had the added effect - because of the "Timing" feature of the invention - of eliminating the sound of the exploding gunpowder when the AR-15 was in use - in much the same way it eliminated the audible reverberations of gas passing in the original commercial design, although the mil spec version was slightly different. Ms. Ladylaw - head of accounting, customer service, marketing, and human resources for AK Bunker - also pointed out one day in a staff meeting that the R&D expense of FART could be recaptured by incorporating it into this latest military contract. El Jefe was so pleased with this development that he retracted his previous ban on Waffle House chili being served in the employee cafeteria.
As dawn broke quietly over the secret volcano base, pushing back the storm clouds of the night before, a select team from El Jefe's private Armadillo Eradication division was standing by for deployment to a classified location to test the newest version of the AR-15. Working feverishly in his shop through the night, El Jefe had managed to attach a MDTLD to one of the company's prototype AR-15's and figured it was ready for initial proving tests. As luck would have it, the mounting hardware, which had been El Jefe's biggest concern, proved to be stronger than necessary but other problems were discovered in the field.
Tune in to the next episode for details on the initial testing of the AK Bunker Armadillo Annihilator.
Episode 2 - Field Testing The MDTLD
As El Jefe toiled away in his private workshop, he was mildly annoyed by the repeated claps of thunder as the sound made its way through the hundreds a feet of soil and rock above. He was in the most highly secluded part of the AK Bunker headquarters campus deep underground beneath the headquarters campus at the secret volcano base but the sound of "God's gunfire" during the thunderstorm made its way through nevertheless. It was this annoyance at the unwelcome noise, which distracted his thought process, that spawned El Jefe's most brilliant idea to date. "What if I mate the MDTLD to one of those new-fangled repeating rifles we just started selling to the Confederation Navy?"
AK Bunker had recently developed a musket that would not only re-load itself automatically from a bucket of bullets hung beneath the rifle on a thin strand of magtanium wire, but fired projectiles at much higher velocity than the current muskets in use by the Navy's elite special operations teams. Another feature of the new Ak bunker Repeating musket (AR Musket) was the elimination of the traditional bell mouth at the business end of the bullet belching tube, since ram-rods were no longer required for loading. The elimination of the bell-mouth was incorporated in model 15 of the AR Musket and it became known among the elite military units as the AR-15. Because there was room for storage of their Playboy and Penthouse training manuals in the bucket along with the bullets, the ammunition storage container of the AR-15 weapon system became known as the "Magazine."
The crowning glory of the AR-15 design - made possible by the elimination of the bell-mouth on the bullet belching tube - was the integral baffle arrangement built into the tube. Leeboat had integrated his earlier invention, known as the Fragrant Aroma Retention & Timing (FART) device into the bullet belching tube of the AR-15 in an effort to keep the troops from being annoyed by the pungent smell of the burnt gunpowder. The troops didn't find this feature to be particularly important but this word never made it back to the Polygon, so the Navy never asked for a reduction in the contract price.
The FART had never become a commercial success because Leeboat underestimated the number of people who needed to be able to pass gas under the bed covers without disturbing their spouse. It seems that Princess Rebecca was particularly offended by Leeboat's gaseous nocturnal emissions and made some threat about withholding certain domestic services unless reasonably pleasant breathing atmosphere could be maintained. Necessity, as they say, is the mother of invention and this untenable situation led to the Leeboat's invention of the FART device.
Incorporation of FART into the bullet belching tube of the AR-15 resulted in elimination of gunpowder aroma for the troops and had the added effect - because of the "Timing" feature of the invention - of eliminating the sound of the exploding gunpowder when the AR-15 was in use - in much the same way it eliminated the audible reverberations of gas passing in the original commercial design, although the mil spec version was slightly different. Ms. Ladylaw - head of accounting, customer service, marketing, and human resources for AK Bunker - also pointed out one day in a staff meeting that the R&D expense of FART could be recaptured by incorporating it into this latest military contract. El Jefe was so pleased with this development that he retracted his previous ban on Waffle House chili being served in the employee cafeteria.
As dawn broke quietly over the secret volcano base, pushing back the storm clouds of the night before, a select team from El Jefe's private Armadillo Eradication division was standing by for deployment to a classified location to test the newest version of the AR-15. Working feverishly in his shop through the night, El Jefe had managed to attach a MDTLD to one of the company's prototype AR-15's and figured it was ready for initial proving tests. As luck would have it, the mounting hardware, which had been El Jefe's biggest concern, proved to be stronger than necessary but other problems were discovered in the field.
Tune in to the next episode for details on the initial testing of the AK Bunker Armadillo Annihilator.
